Highs and Lows

This is a really nice picture, taken by Erin (our co-facilitator), of just one small part of Cazuca near where Diana and I live.

I have had quite an interesting past few days. Firstly, this Saturday was my spa day, and I still really can't believe that I won such a great prize. Saturday morning I was still pretty skeptical about the whole thing (I mean, honestly, who actually wins prizes from corporate companies), but by Saturday evening I was a true believer. Chocolate therapy, massage, exfoliation, tai-chi, jacuzzi, sauna, great food, beautiful surroundings...it was probably the richest thing I've ever done in my life--if that helps you envision how lavish this place was. Now juxtapose that with living in Cazuca, where the sprawl of intense poverty is almost unimaginable and we have to cross a putrid smelling, sewage contaminated lake if we want to leave the neighborhood. This is just a taste of the great inequality that exists here in Colombia.

Emotionally, last week was pretty hard for me. Things at work were going well, and I was feeling better about my role at the school. However emotionally I was a mess. Since I work, live, and go to church in the same building, it is rare that I leave my house on any given day, and I think the reality of my living situation for the next year and a half made me feel like the world was closing in on me. It's not that I don't want to be here, it's just that life isn't so easy being in this new, very small, world. Last week, I also had my first face to face disagreement about theology with my boss. I was pretty frustrated after our conversation, especially for the way in which the conversation was handled and for my language barrier, but I know that this won't be our last discussion, so I'm praying for wisdom and humility for our next interactions, and I'm hoping that with time and with increased respect things will improve.

This week, I've been feeling a lot better (maybe it was getting out of the house last weekend)! Honestly, it is hard to explain how much my mental health has improved this week, I'm not completely back to my normal happy self, but I'm definitely feeling more me and much less hopeless. However, physical health wise, I'm not good. I'm not sure if I have parasite or a really bad virus, but I haven't been able to keep food down for a couple of days now. Further, a family from our community has been threatened, and have had to leave the neighborhood for safety reasons. There is no reason for anyone else in our community to feel fearful or scared, but this situation has certainly shaken many, and rightly so. I think a certain amount of increased caution is warranted, but personally, I'm more worried about the family's trauma than anything else.

I think I'll end with this. Please pray for this family's safety and peace, and please pray for my health--mental, physical, and spiritual.

Love, me

p.s. Kels, I'm still working on formulating and articulating my feelings about Colombia--don't think I forgot about you.